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Husband, Wife, Partner, Significant Other, or What?

2/11/2013

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It seems that the Miriam Webster dictionary has failed to keep up with the rapidly changing times. I checked the word husband and the definition is pretty much described as the male gender of a marriage between a man and a woman. Wife, in a similar manner, is the female in that same marriage. And, if the couple is not married, then it is partner, significant other, or friend with benefits.  So far, so good, but the entire definition goes to hell in a hand basket when the couple is gay.
In the states that have sanctioned marriage for homosexual couples, there seems to be no definite terminology to describe the politically correct way to identify the respective role that each person in the marriage is to be recognized. Does the official performing the ceremony say “I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride or groom”? Although I am not usually bound by political correctness, it would help to have some guidelines.
The reason that I started questioning these definitions is due to the widespread comments in the media (TV) and on websites that cover social issues. I frequently see openly gay men refer to their partner as their wife or husband. And the same is true for women. For example, Ellen DeGeneres always refers to Portia de Rossi as her wife. My question in this Wild West of societal change is what makes one a husband or a wife? Clearly it is not gender driven
I initially thought that the confusion was generational, but, that seems to not be the fact. Commenter’s on many blogs have raised the same questions and span several different age groups. Perhaps we will have some clarity when all of the states have the same laws regarding same sex marriage.
The trend? Continued confusion and uncertainty will prevail until new terms are accepted and redefined. Until then, when Miriam Webster changes the definition I will use partner. Comments are always welcomed…Ken


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